I guess since they are both dead, and one as a sign to shut the fuck up, when Williams tried to call his new tour CENSORED. We had both been through harrowing shit, in this war, and he was on a side asking me questions, did I want people to take orders from me on how to live... and I said the last thing I want to do is order people around. Etc.. They interacted directly with me, a thing that seemed rare to me though was of course not at all... Robin Williams and Johnathon Winters. Amazing how they took old shows and used them. I have no clue how they did it. I began to think they made the films long ago, and they were part of the plan. They had about sixty years of shit into this plan, a lot of money brought us about, and I had no clue it was a coup. I messed it up. Thank God. Put me with shitty people and I end up being shitty back, no matter how afraid everyone is of them. Fuck that. Lived through too much to think I am at all easy to kill. God wants me alive. That is rather difficult to overcome, as many have learned.
I think back on that night and the dinosaurs and the imagery, when you needed a leader, I was fresh off being brainwashed into believing I was Jesus. Not a state of mind to be anything except used. I believed I was the bit of some God after my vision of God, not God at all... but Jesus. For what it is worth, and perhaps there is some. As I watched ANGEL
Wondering about the ploy of dead men, who talked of monsters and volcano's, trying to ask me what they should do, and I had no clue how to answer. I am no dictator, especially not over other people's personalities, thoughts, etc... man, believe what you want, we will not always agree, and I will not always be right, and like to know. Nothing personal, who is closer to the truth. Williams and Winters... remember? I could not see an image of Dinosaur without having to poker face thru, same with trains. Too many things. None as important as talents taken and abused, used; the artistic freedom within certain limits, promoting certain values, going along with what will gain the largest audience, from both parties, all demographics.... gone. I feel an ocean of pain out there, represented by stewart saying they kept him in a brick room between shows, and he was changing the shows all day and was live... weird times. I thought he was joking, though he is out now. I do not know ..
